Old Lady Concert Rule #12 (probably): Always have a concert buddy.
Concert buddies are an important part of the concert going experience. Even for me, a person who enjoys doing things by myself, concerts don't fall into the group of activities that are more enjoyable alone. I would add sporting events, protests, holiday parties (particularly for work), and weddings to the list of things you should never attend alone. The safety factor is one part of this, but honestly, concerts are just more fun when you go with other people.
I've attended a few concerts by myself over the years and it's not nearly as much fun as it should be. Most of the shows have been at places like Ram's Head in Baltimore and the 9:30 Club in DC, which are both standing room only venues. Take the fun factor out of the mix for a second, logistical items like getting a drink or going to the bathroom are much more difficult because there's no one to protect your space. Despite my height, I prefer to stand at the back of the club, so it's a little better for me, but it's still annoying. If you don't make friends with your neighbors, you're out of luck. I lucked out at the last show I saw alone and made friends with the two people standing next to me. They protected my space and I did the same for them. We were all wearing the same shoes, which is why we started talking. Granted, it was a Green Day show so the odds were in my favor that at least half of the crowd would be wearing the same shoes as me, but they could have been jerks and then I would have been out of luck.
That's been my experience at most of the other shows I've gone to by myself. People around me weren't the most pleasant or just kept to themselves, which is 100% acceptable. At a Patti Smith show a few years ago, I got into an uncomfortable discussion with two drunk, older dudes next to me about how everything was better before I was born. They had seen her in the 70s in New York and it was so much better (obviously) and I was so unlucky to be born when I was born. I told them to stop talking like a bunch of elitist concert-going assholes. They were one step away from telling kids to get off their lawns and turn that racket down. This could have gone very bad, very quickly, but instead they apologized and offered to protect my space if I wanted to go get a drink or anything. They were polite to me the rest of the night. I could tell they were also annoyed; such is the delicate ego of a 70s "punk" dude.
These experiences aside, going to concerts with friends is funner. There's no other word to describe it. From the waiting to get in or in the parking lot to the people watching to the actual concert itself, the experience is better with other people. Having a concert buddy is actually how the Old Lady Concert rules became a thing; I started complaining about people standing at a seated show, which led to me discussing my old lady tendencies with Anita. The rules were born and we must abide.
My older brother, Scott, and my friend Anita are my concert buddies. I could add my dad here as well since he did take me to my first two concerts, but I'm not sure that counts. Both Scott and Anita are ideal concert buddies: we like a lot of the same music, but also like different musicians so we all get exposed to new bands because of the other person. I took both of them to their first Decemberists concert (different shows) and Anita went with me to Wilco last summer. Scott and I tend to go to metal shows or we travel for shows. He's the kind of concert buddy that replies, "Memphis" when you ask where he wants to see the Foo Fighters.
This brings me to the Indigo Girls.
I have to admit something about my life as a 90s girl: I only know three songs by the Indigo Girls. Not only do I only know three songs by the band, they're the songs that everyone knows, "Closer to Fine", "Galileo", and "Elizabeth." I'm sure I know other songs by the band, but I couldn't name them if you paid me a million dollars. They're just not my jam. However, it doesn't mean I don't appreciate their music or their talent. Amy and Emily are amazingly talented and also happen to be exceptionally cool human beings. They're activists and have been successful both as a duo and as solo artists. They were also hugely popular at a time in my life where so much good music was coming out. As I always tell people, you can't listen to everything. While I never disliked them, I was more into Tori Amos, Liz Phair, Riot Grrrl bands like Bikini Kill and Sleater-Kinney, grunge bands, Green Day, and hard rock from the 70s. I listened to R.E.M. and 10,000 Maniacs and Fiona Apple. I was "discovering" Big Star and the Velvet Underground and enjoying a bunch of really terrible one-hit wonder songs from bands whose names I can't remember. The 1990s were an amazing time for music.
Anita, on the other hand, is a huge Indigo Girls fan. She's now seen them in concert 15 times. She knows all the words and all the guitars. So when she asked me to go with her to the concert (which was last week), of course I said yes. That's what concert buddies do. I'm also never going to say no to going to Wolf Trap, except for live theatre and the Grease sing-a-long. Trust me on both of these things.
It was a great show. The opening act, The War and Treaty, were super fun. They reminded me of a few bands I used to go see in New Orleans. They're a husband and wife duo and are maybe the most adorable human beings I've ever seen on stage together. They came out later to join the Indigo Girls for "Closer to Fine," which closed out the encore. The Indigo Girls tour with a band sometimes; this is not that tour. It's the two of them and a violinist (Lyris Hung). They switch out guitars for almost every song. Anita told me it's a system the band has had in place for years. She told that there was a time in her Indigo Girls fan life where she could have told me the song they were about to play because of the guitars. That is a true fan.
What I enjoyed most about this concert was that I had no expectations at all. Normally when I go see a show, I stress about whether the band is going to play my favorite song or if they're going to be play too many new songs. With few exceptions, new songs aren't always the best songs (I'm looking at you, Bob Dylan on the Modern Times tour). Concert anticipation is both a blessing and a curse; it can often lead to a horrible let down. I didn't have to experience that at all with the Indigo Girls. I figured they'd play "Closer to Fine" and "Galileo." I wasn't going to be disappointed if they didn't play "Elizabeth" or if they only played "Closer to Fine." My stake in the concert game was low, and it was amazing. I spent time watching Anita and other fans experience their favorite (or a favorite) band. It was nice to just listen to very talented musicians do their thing and fans enjoying themselves.
If that's not a perfect summer concert, I don't know what is.
Next time on the Island: Another concert, the song of the summer, and why sometimes you need to follow really innocent accounts on Twitter.
Set list photo
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