Friday, March 28, 2014

We Can Be Heroes: G-L-O-R-I-A

When I was in kindergarten (in Sparta, WI) I had an unfortunate altercation with a bicycle. I remember very little of the actual event - I was outside playing with friends on our street and I was running. A boy (older than me) on a bike was riding towards me and we collided. The bike's kickstand punctured my left leg and left a gaping hole. I don't remember there being any blood (my mom said it was because the puncture wound went too deep to bleed) and I recall being given a Dr. Pepper while being stitched up. The stitching up part is also hazy but family lore tells me that the doctor told my parents that I had more stitches in my leg than anyone else he had ever treated. My mom held my hand the whole time and I got to eat dinner on the couch because I had to keep my leg elevated (I guess). Maybe this incident is the true explanation for why I don't like running. Running leads to puncture wounds.

What does this have to do with my final hero, Gloria Steinem? On the surface, not very much. I don't know Gloria personally so it's not like she sent me something during my recovery and that's why I admire her. The bicycle incident left me with a 4 inch scar on my thigh. When I was younger it was a badge of honor; kids thought I was cool. But as I got older that changed. The angry red mark on my leg was weird and I became very aware that anything, even a scar that was the cause of an accident, had the potential for ridicule. Perfection is where it's at (at least for some) and my scar was not perfect (even if it came with an epic story). So I proceeded to hide it; shorts and skirts had to be very specific lengths and I loathed any event that required a bathing suit (I imagine this also has to do with other things but that's a post for another day). My scar and I spent my preteen and teen years in a love-hate relationship.

College was probably the point in time when I became a feminist. I think I always had feminist tendencies and I certainly knew what feminism was (I was obsessed with the 1960s and 70s as a teenager so prime time for the women's movement) but I would not have declared myself a feminist before college. The word carried a negative connotation and I was not yet brave enough to defend what I believed (at least not all of the time). It's also when I started reading Gloria Steinem's writing (and Ms.magazine). Gloria made sense to me and most of her ideas and musings on gender, race, poverty, and equality were like what I believed. I believe in choice and I was finding the words to help me defend that belief. And then I read an essay entitled "In Praise of Women's Bodies" in the anthology Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions. Gloria talked about scars and the emotional power behind them (she was talking about scars related to giving birth) but her words made me think differently about my scar. For men, scars are often a sign of bravery and why couldn't I think of my scar in the same way? I hadn't given birth to anyone but I had been brave in the face of a stupid childhood accident. I was fearless about it as a kindergartner and I would be fearless now. From then on my scar and I had only a love-love relationship. I see it as a part of me and if you believe, as I do, that our bodies tell our story as much as our voices, it is just one interesting story that mine can tell.

Gloria helped me to form the definition of feminism that I follow (the equality and full humanity of women and men) and from her I learned that it was okay to have fears; having fears makes us human. I always found her fear of public speaking and interesting one (I have a fear of bridges). Her writing always seemed like that of a trusted friend. Maybe because my feminism truly started with The Heidi Chronicles I was more at ease with a second wave feminist who didn't make me feel bad about my beliefs or choices. While I admire and respect many of the more radical writers and activists of the same period (and now), I feel more comfortable with Gloria. It doesn't have to be "either you shave your legs or you don't."

Like Diane Keaton, I also appreciate Gloria and her approach to aging. She celebrated her 80th birthday this past Tuesday. For someone who was often belittled because of her looks (one of her most famous essays was "I Was a Playboy Bunny"), she has handled aging gracefully and without the intervention of anything (except some hair dye). I love this quote from a recent New York Times article:

“Fifty was a shock, because it was the end of the center period of life. But once I got over that, 60 was great. Seventy was great. And I loved, I seriously loved aging. I found myself thinking things like: ‘I don’t want anything I don’t have.’ How great is that?” But, she added, “80 is about mortality, not aging. Or not just aging.”

Happy Birthday Gloria Steinem! Thank you for helping me accept me for me and develop a vocabulary and belief system I still have today. I can't wait to see what you do at 100.


This Is What 80 Looks Like
Gloria Steinem's website
Ms. Magazine

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

An Instagram vacation is totally a thing

Howdy Island readers! Spring has basically sprung (yesterday's snow aside) so it's time to hop in the car and take my annual March road trip. Last year, I spent some time in and around Charlottesville. It's nice to get outside of the DMV every now and then.

This year, I've decided to do something a little different. I recently got back onto Instagram and decided that I would use Instagram to document my March adventure. I know lots of people (maybe even some of you) like to document your food on Instagram; I want you to be happy so you do what you want to do. Just make smart life choices and maybe don't be that guy that's at a table of people and all of you whip out your phones at the same time to document brunch. It's weird.

To me, Instagram is the perfect medium to document a road trip. Filters give photos that dreamy quality I identify with old post cards and photographs and ultimately, memories of road trips from my childhood. It also lends itself to the weird and off beat. That is exactly where my road trip will take me. I'll be visiting roadside attractions and unusual attractions in Baltimore, Charlottesville (and some surrounding towns), and Richmond. I'll also throw in an exhibition game at Nationals Park just for fun.There may or may not be a stop at a large roller skate and it's possible some dinosaurs will be involved.

I'll be documenting the entire trip on Instagram. If you want to join my adventure (at least in photos) you can follow me @eagarland. All photos will be tagged with the hashtag #misfittoysroadtrip2014 for easy searching.

See you on the road!

Coming Saturday: The final We Can Be Heroes post.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

We Can Be Heroes: Women Who Rock

I'm was watching the highly underrated movie version of Josie and the Pussycats when I started writing this post. I love this movie and you should too. It's funny, campy, and features a boy band comprised of Breckin Meyer, Seth Green, and Donald Faison, and, more importantly, a pre-Sharknado Tara Reid. Good stuff. It's sort of fitting given this week's theme: women who rock. When I was six, I wanted to be Josie (the cartoon was in rotation when I was little despite coming out before I was born). I've always had rock star dreams despite the fact that I don't sing or play an instrument. A girl can dream.

When I set out to write about women that I admire, I knew that I wouldn't be able to select one female musician or band. There are just too many; it would be like asking a parent to pick their favorite child (although I suspect you all can) or if I asked my friend Anita to pick her favorite Muppet. Some things should just be left unsaid. Instead of picking one, I've decided to do a top five. I just love a list.

I dedicate this post to my album club - I hope that when we get the band back together we'll make some time to discuss these women who rock alongside your continued efforts to convince me of the merits of Billy Joel, 311, and sad electronica.

1. Patti Smith: Listening to Patti Smith is like listening to a poem. She packs so much meaning and passion into every syllable that it can be a bit overwhelming sometimes. If you haven't read her book Just Kids you should go and do so right now. I had the opportunity to see her live about a year ago and it was one of the best concerts I've been too. If Patti Smith ever tried to take over the world, I'd be right there behind her. She cares and she has charisma but not in an annoying way. She also tells a great story and has a delightfully wicked sense of humor. For me, Patti is that true punk rock soul - a tad angry, a touch romantic, a dash sarcastic, and a mite unconventional.

Favorites songs: Because the Night, People Have the Power, April Fool, Mosaic, Gloria, Easter, Smells Like Teen Spirit, Redondo Beach, The Jackson Song

2. Tori Amos: Like most women my age (or so I assume), I listened to a lot of Tori Amos in high school. My high school theatre was a big part of this (it's what the cool kids were doing) but besides that, I really liked the combination of her classical training with modern touches. Tori was angry (for very good reasons) and the imagery and phrasing in her songs packs a huge punch.  Little Earthquakes was the first CD that I ever bought. Whenever I listen to it, I immediately flash back to the first time I listened to the songs. I hadn't really heard women sing songs like that. I saw her live on the Dew Drop Inn tour when I was in high school - it was definitely a show.

It's through Tori that I learned about RAINN, an amazing organization that provides services and support for victims of sexual violence. RAINN was the first charity I ever gave money to and it was because of a rock musician that I was even aware it existed.

Favorite songs: Little Earthquakes, Caught a Lite Sneeze, The Waitress, God, Marianne, Cornflake Girl, Take to the Sky, Not the Red Baron, China, Sugar, Strange Little Girl, The New Age, Smells Like Teen Spirit (the last three are covers)

3. Dolly and Loretta: Yes, Dolly Parton and Loretta Lynn are two people and I said this was a top five. But it's my blog and I make the rules so there. My grandfather loved country music. I have no idea where this Polish Detroiter got into country but I have fond memories of watching TNN with him (although I'm sure I complained a bit when I was 12) and it's because of him that I adore the songs Dolly, Loretta, Patsy Cline, Merle Haggard, and dozens of other "classic" country artists (for real, Ernest Tubb's version of "El Paso" is so good).

I love the stories of Dolly Parton and Loretta Lynn - they have the kinds of upbringings that are ripe for country songs. I love listening to them sing about love and loss. They're also a little cheeky which is always fun. What's great about both women is their ability to reinvent themselves: Dolly has had an incredibly successful film career (please watch Rhinestone) and a huge hit with "Travelin' Thru" from the film Transamerica. Let's not forget that Dollywood exists (I will get there one day). Loretta came back in a big way with Van Lear Rose released in 2004. Jack White produced and performed on the album. It is stunningly amazing; I can listen to it over and over again and hear something new every time.

Favorites (Dolly): Jolene, I Will Always Love You, 9 to 5, the entire Rhinestone soundtrack, Islands in the Stream (because reasons), Applejack, Love Is Like a Butterfly

Favorites (Loretta): Rated X, Portland, Oregon, Louisiana Woman, Mississippi Man, One's On the Way, Little Red Shoes, You Ain't Woman Enough, Coal Miner's Daughter, Blue Kentucky Girl, Don't Come Home A-Drinkin' (With Lovin' On Your Mind)


4. The Bangles: Let's clear up something: Susanna Hoffs was not the lead singer of The Bangles. Vocal duties were divided evenly among members of the band (including sisters Vicki and Debbi Peterson, and Annette Zilinskas - original lineup). Hoffs was often singled out as the lead vocalist and she did sing some of their more popular songs. Of course, this is one of the reasons the band broke up but let's focus on the positive. The group was heavily inspired by 60s pop and folk and New Wave - their music is definitely a great combination of those genres. I wanted to be a Bangle (but not Susanna) in the worst way when I was about 13 years old. They seemed so cool and awesome. I wanted to hang out with them and move to California.

There's an episode of Gilmore Girls where Lorelei and Sookie get tickets to see The Bangles. They plan on taking Rory and Lane but things change and Lorelei ends up giving the epic seats to Rory and the snobby girls from Chilton, hoping to help Rory make friends at her new school. Lorelei and Sookie sit in the nosebleed section. I like to think that if I have a daughter I will do the same thing for her at some concert. It probably won't be The Bangles but I'm sure some band I love will still be around if I ever have a teenager.

Favorites: In Your Room, In a Different Light (my absolute favorite), Hazy Shade of Winter (a cover), If She Knew What She Wants, Hero Takes a Fall, Eternal Flame (because we all love this song)

5. Liz Phair/Neko Case: Another combo but they represent significant periods in my life and thus must both be included. I started listening to Liz Phair in college (I know, shocking a girl listening to Liz Phair in the late 90s) and Neko Case in my late 20s. Musically, they're very different but they represent periods of transition in my life. Do I identify with everything from their songs? No, but I do admire their DIY aesthetic (I can't believe I just typed that) and their power. Listening to Liz and Neko makes me want to roar.

Exile in Guyville is one of my favorite albums of all time. Phair has often been quoted as saying that the album is a song-by-song reply to The Rolling Stones Exile on Main Street. There are a lot of similarities and I always felt like it was her playing where the boys played. Her songs are raw, sort of deadpan, and sexually charged in a way that is very reminiscent of "cock rock" bands like the Stones and Led Zeppelin. I also wasn't as bothered by her more recent pop-rock songs; artists change and grow too. "Extraordinary" is a fantastic song.

I stumbled upon Neko Case when her album The Fox Confessor Brings the Flood was released in 2006. When I would drive around New Orleans, I would listen to that album, the first Raconteurs album, and Van Lear Rose over and over again. There's something soothing about all three albums especially as a collective entity. Then Middle Cyclone was released and the cover art was Neko like this:


How bad ass is that? It's also an exceptional album. Her lyrics are poetic and powerful and she has a country feel about her without being a country singer. Maybe it's because she's Canadian. If you're not following her on Twitter you should be; she's hilarious and mouthy and awesome. It's easy to just be like "here I am, this is who I am - deal with it" when you have Liz and Neko in your corner.

Favorites (Liz): Ant in Alaska, Divorce Song, Dance of Seven Veils, 6'1, Supernova, Extraordinary, Why Can't I?, Polyester Bride, Fuck and Run, White Chocolate Space Egg, Nashville

Favorites (Neko): The Virginian, This Tornado Loves You, Pretty Girls, Margaret v. Pauline, That Teenage Feeling, Hold On, Hold On, Mood to Burn Bridges, Bowling Green, The Next Time You Say Forever, I'm An Animal, Man, Ragtime, I'm From Nowhere, Madonna of the Wasps


So there you have the top five (or seven but who's counting?). There are so many I've left off: Dusty Springfield, Hole, The Supremes, Sleater-Kinney, The Breeders, Adele, The Runaways, Joan Jett, Katy Perry, Marianne Faithful, L7, Lisa Loeb, Lucinda Williams, Patsy Cline, Kelly Clarkson, Carly Simon, Carole King, Martha Reeves, Nico, Irma Thomas. I could do this for days and never get bored.

Spend the rest of Women's History Month (and maybe all of your time after March) listening to these awesome women who rock. If you need me to, I'll make you a mix. Seriously, I'll make you a mix (or at least suggest one to you in the comments).

Coming Soon: My final "We Can Be Heroes" post, an Instagram vacation, and it's finally (I hope) spring!

Josie and the Pussycats

Saturday, March 15, 2014

We Can Be Heroes: Shoulder pads are not for the weak

There is a scene early in the movie Because I Said So where Diane Keaton creates a personal ad for her perpetually single daughter, Milly, played by Mandy Moore (why Mandy Moore would have a problem landing a man is beyond me but whatever, I have suspended my disbelief for films more outlandish than this). Anyway, the ad ends up being something like 1000 words (which is ridiculously expensive) and attracts exactly the type of men (and a few women if I remember correctly) that you would expect. Keaton's Daphne does this without her daughter's permission and then proceeds to interview potential suitors. Several stars of WB/CW and USA shows make appearances, hilarity ensues, multiple cakes are destroyed for no good reason, and everyone finds love. Also, Lauren Graham gets to be married to the sheriff from Eureka. Even if nothing else interesting happened in this movie, I would consider that last part a win.

I saw this movie in the theatre with my mother. It's not a great movie nor is is the worst movie that came out that year (Good Luck Chuck was also released that year - it is legitimately horrible). The cast is pleasant, the kitchens are to die for, and the sheriff from Eureka and the musician are nice to look at. I also really loved the polka dot dresses Diane and Mandy wear. There are two key takeaways from this movie: 1. Diane Keaton is amazing no matter what and 2. At least my mother understands boundaries enough and has never put a personal ad out into the world for me. At least I don't think she has. It's very possible that my mother has done this, interviewed all the eligible men in the greater DC area, and decided that none of them were worthy of her daughter. Doubtful but possible.

There are several constants in my favorite Diane Keaton films: her ability to wear hats and furs, never being lost in a sea of actors (she's tends to star opposite of actors who take up a lot of space), graceful awkwardness, and her magnificent ability to convey the entire emotion of a scene with a look or a gesture. There are so many moments that just slay me and she doesn't say anything. She's also incredibly funny - so many of her roles are in great dramas but she's such a phenomenal comedienne. One of my favorite quotes from her memoir Then Again is about humor, "Humor helps us get through life with a modicum of grace. It offers one of the few benign ways of coping with the absurdity of it all."

My favorite films include The Godfather, The Godfather Part II, Reds, Annie Hall, Baby Boom, and The First Wives Club (it's also not a great movie but seriously, Goldie, Bette, and Diane - amazing). Even in her most vulnerable moments on screen, you can see the strength of the character. And so fashionable! I covet her wardrobe in almost all of her films but could never wear half of it (it wouldn't look like me). From her vintage menswear looks to the elegance of a mafia wife to those polka dot dresses with belts, she just makes it look easy. Let's talk shoulder pads for a minute: I'm not entirely sure if my memory is correct but I seem to recall in Baby Boom that even her bathrobe had shoulder pads.That takes courage. Another fun acting fact: she was in the original cast of the musical Hair but refused to do the nude scene at the end of the first act. You do you, Diane Keaton. You should also listen to original cast recording on this song; these are my earliest memories of Diane Keaton - I was obsessed with this musical in high school.

Acting chops aside, Diane is also a writer, producer, director, photographer, and apparently has been successful in real estate (thanks for that little nugget Wikipedia). That's an incredible hyphenate. She's also a mother (she adopted two children) and never married.

That's a lot to admire and this could be where I stop but there's one more thing that I admire about Diane Keaton - she wants to age. A reoccurring topic in her memoir (which focus on her mother's writing as well) was her relationship with beauty and beauty standards. She has always spoken out against plastic surgery and altering one's appearance to fit a beauty standard that isn't natural. I love this quote from More magazine, "I'm stuck in this idea that I need to be authentic... My face needs to look the way I feel." It's not about altering your looks but being healthy and taking care of yourself. At the end of it, it's about being you and being happy with being you. The flaws (as Diane Arbus tells us), are what we notice. I would argue that the flaws are what make a person them so I applaud Diane for always being herself, flaws and all.

"Memories are simply moments that refuse to be ordinary." Diane Keaton, Then Again

Photo credits:
Annie Hall1
Godfather 
Because I Said So
Video links from YouTube

Saturday, March 8, 2014

We Can Be Heroes - Heidi, Janie, and Christmas cakes after Christmas

Happy International Women's Day and  Women's History Month! I know, we get a whole month and internationally, a day. It's pretty great.

All kidding aside, I thought I'd spend the rest of March discussing women that I admire and that have influenced me in some way. I was partially inspired by this article I read in The Washington Post about celebrities versus heroes (in the lead up to the Oscars) and this other article about women in leadership positions at area museums. I was having a cup of tea before my museum shift started and the idea to talk about the influential women in my life just sort of hit me. These women are definitely all Leading Ladies.

I don't know a lot of people who truly enjoyed high school. I'm sure everyone has fond memories of high school but unless you went to high school without other students chances are it wasn't that fun all the time. When I think of high school I think of two things: my terrible high school English teacher and my high school theatre. All of my favorite memories from high school are tied to the theatre department. I made a lot of great friends and certainly had some wacky and weird experiences while working on shows. This was also where I honed my bossiness and responsibility; I was in charge a lot.

Not only did I work on all of the productions, I was also in theatre class so I was learning stagecraft, design, theatre history, acting and directing techniques, and reading plays all the time. Our director (who is still the director at my high school) didn't just focus on the classics or Williams and O'Neil; we also read Sam Shepard, Paul Rudnick, William M. Hoffman, Christopher Durang, Beth Henley, and Wendy Wasserstein. He also liked to do Shakespeare with a twist (our In the Course of Justice was Shakespeare goes Tarantino and won us a district championship) and our production of Rashomon is still one of my favorites.

Wendy Wasserstein quickly became one of my favorite playwrights. She won the 1989 Tony Award and Pulitzer Prize for The Heidi Chronicles. This is probably her most well known play and my favorite. All of her plays had intelligent and independent women as their heroines. What I think appealed to me most, though, was that they were not perfect women. They had flaws and doubted their abilities. They worried about love and "having it all". While I wasn't concerned (necessarily) with many of these ideas as a 17 year old, I was navigating the world of being a young woman and what that means. I didn't really date in high school and I didn't think that I was pretty. I wasn't sure what I wanted to be when I grew up. Wasserstein's heroines, particularly Heidi, made me feel better about life. You could grow up and do whatever you wanted to do. And you could be funny and smart and independent. I wanted to be all of those things.

I've worked on two productions of The Heidi Chronicles: in high school I was the stage manager (and everyone got stomach flu when we went to competition with the production) and in college, I was the costume designer. I haven't been able to find all of my photos from that production but look at that cast. I was incredibly proud of my costume choices. It's a challenging play in that it moves from the late 1960s through the late 1980s so the fashion changes quickly but still has to remain true to the character. My favorite looks in that production were Debbie from the museum protest and Becky from the consciousness raising group. She reminds me of Judy Chicago in early photographs.


During my senior year of high school, Wendy (I feel like she'd be okay with me calling her Wendy) released her first children's book, Pamela's First Musical. My friend Leah and I went to the Folger Library to hear her talk about the book and her other work and we got to meet Wendy briefly (as she signed our copies of the story). I don't remember much from the talk itself (apparently I hadn't started taking notes at these things like I do now) but I do remember how nice she was to Leah and I when we talked to her. I think I told her that we had just done a production of The Heidi Chronicles and I gushed about how much I liked her plays. Or something very theatre nerd of me. I also remember thinking it was cool that Leah and I got to go to the talk in the first place; that's what Metro accessibility and being "an adult" (at 17) gets you. Leah is often the person that comes to mind when I read Wendy's plays; she and I did a scene from Isn't It Romantic during class once (and also a scene from Beth Henley's wonderful Crimes of the Heart). I think we both were looking for role models in other women and Wendy was someone we both admired. Wendy was never conventional nor were her heroines and I think that was part of her appeal.

In addition to her plays (I've read all but the last one multiple times), I devoured her book of essays Bachelor Girls. Most of the essays were written for New York Women magazine and cover all manner of topics. Two of my favorites are "Tokyo Story" and "Perfect Women Who Are Bearable." It's in "Tokyo Story" that Wendy learns about "Christmas cakes after Christmas" (her Japanese tour guide tells her this is what unmarried women over 25 are referred to) and that Janie Blumberg and her mother, Lola, make sense outside of New York in the mid-80s. She also teaches us that it's okay to not be Jessica Lange even though Jessica Lange is divine and lovely. Getting both Sam Shepard and Baryshnikov to fall in love with you is only something you should try if you've been in a remake of King Kong. I've been rereading Bachelor Girls recently and it resonates even more now as I approach my mid-30s and am, in fact, a Bachelor Girl. 

Wendy never married but she did have a baby at age 48 (never naming the father) which I thought was incredibly amazing. This gives me hope for my own prospects as a mother. Wendy would write several more plays in the late 90s and early 2000s as well as additional books of essays and the musical adaptation of Pamela's First Musical. In 1998, she created the program Open Doors to mentor and foster a love of the theatre to under-served students in New York City.

It was a sad day in 2006 when I heard that she had died at the age of 55 from complications of lymphoma. The lights were dimmed on Broadway as is the tradition. It's not just her plays and writing that remains but these wonderful ideas that she created through her characters. Wendy understood how challenging it is to be a feminist and still want "traditional" things like a husband and a baby (as Fran says in The Heidi Chronicles, "Susan, either you shave your legs or you don't."). I also enjoy her treatment of the relationships of mothers and daughters - complicated, tension-filled at times, but also wonderful and powerful. I also look at the women who were in early productions of her work - Glenn Close, Swoosie Kurtz, Meryl Streep, Joan Allen. Wendy wasn't just writing plays for herself; she was helping to foster breakthrough performances for amazing actresses.

I'll leave you with a two of my favorite quotes from her plays:

"This portrait can be perceived as a meditation on the brevity of youth, beauty, and life. But what can't?" The Heidi Chronicles

"No matter how lonely you get or how many birth announcements you receive, the trick is not to get frightened. There's nothing wrong with being alone." Isn't It Romantic

Wendy Wasserstein photo

Saturday, March 1, 2014

Erin the List Slayer

When I cannot bear outer pressures any more, I begin to put order in my belongings… As if unable to organize and control my life, I seek to exert this on the world of objects. - See more at: http://simpleworksorganizing.com/blog/2013/4/29/quotes-for-organizing#sthash.xO4S54zt.dpuf
When I cannot bear outer pressures any more, I begin to put order in my belongings… As if unable to organize and control my life, I seek to exert this on the world of objects. - See more at: http://simpleworksorganizing.com/blog/2013/4/29/quotes-for-organizing#sthash.xO4S54zt.dpuf

SCENE: Early morning in an office somewhere in Arlington, VA. We come upon Erin, seated at her desk beginning her day. It is eerily silent and dark; not all the lights have come on given the motion sensor lighting. Erin stares at her calendar and begins to prioritize her day. She looks up and sees, out of the corner of her eye, a shadow. She ignores it and goes back to making her daily to-do list and getting lost in prioritizing her day. The eerie quiet is broken by an unfamiliar voice. 

The Note-taker: Are you using the bullet journal method or a system of your own creation?

Erin: (Small startled scream. She turns to see a an older man, dressed in a trench coat and sitting in her cube mate's chair. He reminds her of a librarian.) Who are you? How did you get in here? And why do you care about my to-do list?

The Note-taker: How I got here is of no importance. You are the Chosen One, the one who can save us all from inefficiency and redundancy. You are the List Slayer!

Erin: Does Elvis talk to you? Does he tell you to do things? Do you see spots?*

The Note-taker: It is your destiny to be the List Slayer and I am your Note-taker. I am here to teach you the ancient ways of bulleted lists and color coding priorities. You can save the world.

Erin: I'm pretty certain I'm hallucinating. Or my coffee was spiked. No, I bet I'm being pranked. My friends always make fun of my lists and this is their little joke. That's how you got in here; they let you in.

The Note-taker: I am not a hallucination nor was your coffee spiked. This is not a prank; I don't even know any of your friends. I would hate to think that they make fun of your lists; what a travesty. I'm sure you didn't think that you would be charged with saving the world but save it you must. Out there is a world full of time thieves and interruptions and the demon of inefficiency and ineffective organizational systems. It is your job to right this wrong and restore order to the world.

Erin: I just really like crossing things off my list. I don't think that qualifies me for saving the world.

The Note-taker: Crossing things off your list might just save your life.

(END SCENE ONE)

From these humble beginnings, a heroine for our time emerges, Erin the List Slayer. Each week, Erin has to accomplish some sort of outlandish list that may or may not include demons or vampires and saving the world. The Note-taker replaces the Watcher and maybe the demons are actually things like interruptions, change of plans, and wasted time. She could have a sidekick (I've always wanted a sidekick) or maybe her own version of the Scoobies. Maybe I have too much time on my hands (or have figured out my National Novel Writing Month idea for next year). Maybe this could be a new Joss Whedon show. Let's also hope that James Marsden is available.

I've been spending a lot of time this week thinking about being a hyper-planner and organizer. This all started two Sundays ago; I woke up before my alarm (which has been happening a lot lately) so I had extra time before I needed to leave for the museum. I'm the co-chair of a charity committee at work and we have a ton of stuff going on right now so I did the thing that I do best: I made 3 separate lists for each of the committee leads organizing or planning an upcoming event. I emailed the lists to the leads and then went about the rest of my day. I felt better as I left for the museum.

If I take a step back this all started several weeks ago when I took the StrengthsFinder assessment for a work event that took place this past Wednesday. The long and short of this assessment is that I'm an organizer, am empathetic, am responsible, I collect things, and I like learning. I know, it's all so shocking. Anyway, because everyone in my division has taken this assessment recently, we've all been discussing our results. And discussing them some more. Basically, I spend a portion of my day thinking and talking about all the things I can organize and how I have a hard time handling deviations from plans and that I feel unnecessarily responsible for everyone. It's like I live in lists and processes and babysit people when we go out. Occasionally my co-workers and friends make fun of these traits. I suspect they find this mostly endearing but I also feel like I annoy them. I guess that's fine because they annoy me sometimes too. (Make a plan! Make smart life choices - I'm not the boss of you!)

I was also co-facilitating a session on time management at the meeting this week. While I was prepping for the session, I made a list (ha) of things I do to keep organized at work. This is what it looked like:
  • Write things down - I have a paper to-do list at work and I write my notes during meeting instead of typing. This means I have to go back and review them before I take action on them.
  • Project pages on our internal network - good way to collaborate with others.
  • Google Docs/Drive - another good way to share and collaborate. I've been using it for so much lately but I feel like I know nothing. I did learn about starring documents this week and I'm super excited to start doing that.
  • Workflowy -  I use Workflowy (which now has an app) for brainstorming projects at work before I'm ready to share them with anyone. You can share the list or parts of it with others and mark things as complete which virtually crosses the item off the list. It's magical.
  • Toggl - This is how I track the hours I spend on projects. I have a lot of projects but it's easy to track time. I update it daily.
  • Color coding my calendars (I have three calendars at work). I use categories similar to what I have on Toggl to code different meetings and needs.
After making this list and thinking about the three emails I had sent, I had one of those moments when I thought, "Am I micromanaging these people and do I need a list intervention?"  Yes, they could have done this themselves but I don't know that they would have (and I don't mean that in a bad way). I love a list but not everyone does. It was as if some sort of list demon had possessed me for the extra half-hour I had in my morning. I have to plan things and it makes me uncomfortable when other people don't ESPECIALLY when I'm working with them or helping in any way. This is a problem, of course, since not every one is list driven and task-oriented. The world needs all kinds of people.

Self-reflection is an important part of life. As I continue on my journey as the leading lady of my own life, it's important to step back and reflect on what makes me who I am. Yes, I'm responsible and task-oriented. I'm also creative and like to think about things and learn new things. However, I have to remember that I am me and no one else is. I have to be able to let other people be in charge of their own projects and lives. I need to delegate and just enjoy (or not) whatever it is that people create and make happen. I am allowed to put the lists away every now and then. I am not responsible for everyone in the room. This is an incredibly hard statement to make and to follow.

And this is why I need Erin the List Slayer. While I let others do their thing (even if it makes me uncomfortable), she can save the world one faulty organizational system at a time.

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Keep Calm
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*Actual quote from the movie version of Buffy the Vampire Slayer