2021 is already shaping up to be another roller coaster year. I was hoping with the return of functional adults to our government, I could return to writing fun and frivolous pieces again. That's partially why I didn't post anything in the last two weeks: I didn't know what to say. I was angry, but writing a post here wasn't helping with processing like it normally does. So I took a break.
But I couldn't let my favorite made up holiday pass by without a post. If we don't celebrate "Answer Your Cat's Questions Day," how would Keely get to know things? We may spend 24 hours a day together (basically), but I don't really take the time to answer his questions. A lot of our day is spent with me working in my office nook and him napping somewhere in the house until he decides he "needs" me. This usually happens when I'm on a Zoom call with my manager or a senior leadership team member. It's awesome. I also created an adorable cat for my daily embroidery project to celebrate. #catmomsrock
Let's get started with this year's questions!!
- Why are you home all the time now? Don't you have a job or friends or stuff to do? You're infringing on my doing cat things time. We're currently living in the middle of a pandemic. There's a very contagious and dangerous virus out there, and being around lots of people is one of the chief ways it spreads. Almost a year ago, my work closed the physical office and asked all employees to work from home until further notice. Now, I get to spend all day at home with you! Think of the benefits: you get your dinner on time every night, I'm around for extra treats during the day, and you've fully embraced your life as a lap cat. You can do you cat things at night or when I'm on Zoom calls.
- Where did the tree go? I like napping under it and rubbing my face on the branches and eating plastic. I love that you love the tree! I haven't put up a Christmas tree since 2013, and wasn't sure how you'd react to a tree being around all the time. Since I was home this year, I figured a tree would be a nice addition to our house. You did look so cute napping under the tree! I don't know why they don't write songs about cats under Christmas trees. It's probably because most cats destroy trees, proving to us time and time again why we can't have nice things. Christmas only lasts so long, so the tree had to be put away until next year. Between now and then, I'd really like you to think about your choices when it comes to eating plastic. It's not good for you, and if you eat too much, we won't have a tree to love at all.
- Why does the red dot disappear? Since you've become incredibly needy at the worst possible times (when I'm presenting during Zoom meetings, for example), I bought you a motion activated laser toy to keep you occupied and to make sure you get exercise. The red dot only works for 15 minutes and then it takes a break for an hour. I promise if you can be patient, it'll come back soon.
- Why did you cry while watching tv in the middle of the day on a Wednesday? Did someone take your favorite toy away? The last four years have been a lot. Ever since He Who Shall Not Be Mentioned took office, it's been one horrible thing after another. He lost re-election (he really did for those of you who are still struggling with this), and on Wednesday, January 20, a new President took office AND the first woman Vice President was sworn in too. It was amazing and emotional and everything I hoped it would be. You're right that I don't normally watch tv in the middle of a workday and I don't normally cry when I watch tv, but it was such a relief to watch the ceremony on Wednesday. My shoulders have relaxed for the first time in a long time. It's important to remember that just because I'm happy about the new administration doesn't mean I'm going to stop holding them accountable and being involved. It just means I might not have to be angry every day for the next four years.
- Did you buy the new comforter for me? It's so fluffy! I did not buy the comforter for you, but let's face it, everything in the house is yours so why pretend it's not. It is so fluffy! I also appreciate the fact that you sleep on my feet every night. I like to pretend it's because you're protecting me, but I know it's really the comforter.
- When are you going to be done working? I need to sit on your lap. What's that I hear? Are you a lap cat?!? When did this happen? I know you like the attention, but I have to work to provide things like your food and toys and the roof over you precious cat head. You seem to have adjusted to our new routine, and I love that you need me to stop at precisely 4 pm every day so we can get some cuddle time in before your dinner.
- Do you really think reading a book is going to stop me from trying to eat chicken? It was worth a try. Look, my food is not your food. I know you think it is, and occasionally, when you're a very good boy, you get some chicken or the tuna can to lick (only because you seem to be able to process tuna). But human food isn't good for you, and Kung Pao Chicken definitely isn't good for you.
- Are the other humans getting a dog? Why do they need a dog? The other humans (my parents and brother) may be getting a dog. Your Uncle Scott really wants a dog, so he's started the process of looking for one to adopt. He has assured me that only dogs who can be around cats will be considered, and more importantly, you're still his favorite cat (named Keely). He won't stop being your dude-bro and the other humans won't stop thinking you're a very good boy. You're one of the family, buddy. We like you.
Please enjoy a sampling of photos of the world's most photogenic cat (probably, if you exclude Norwegian forest cats). Check out my other blog, An Embroidery a Day, for an adorable salute to today's festivities.
