Curtains

A few years ago, one of my friends and her husband bought their first house. I remember having an hours long conversation with her about what color to paint her new kitchen. This was the first home either of them had ever purchased and they were excited to start their first project. Painting was their priority; spending years in apartments where they couldn't paint made them giddy about the possibility of doing whatever they wanted. For a few weeks, it was the only thing she talked about. She must have showed me hundreds of color swatches and it wasn't my decision to make. They eventually settled on pale yellow, a color that complimented their oak furniture. I'm sure they moved onto some other project with the same energy and obsession, but I only remember the kitchen painting project. Their excitement was so contagious. I wanted them to find the perfect color too.

When I bought my condo, I was surprised by how many people asked me what my first project would be. I would respond "Unpack," and people would either laugh at my "joke" or look at me like I was an idiot. They meant home improvement project. I didn't realize that the second you buy a house or condo, you become a home improvement project person; that wasn't in the online class I took before I was approved for my loan. I bought a place that was move-in ready for a reason - I don't want to start my first home buying experience with big projects. Even painting is a big deal. I'm a firm believer in living in a place six months to a year before any major project begins. I want to live in the space before I start changing it. Will I paint my bedroom? Probably, but I'd like to move all my furniture first. Do I hate the guest bathroom shower floor? Yes, it looks like a gym bathroom, but it works and I have years to live before changing it. I'm not going anywhere and I need to save money to do something like that.

It's not to say that I don't need to do things around the condo to make it my own. I knew when moving in I would need to set up an office space for myself. It was one of the things I most wanted when I bought a place; a dedicated work space instead of using the kitchen table. My brother gave me the idea of making the nook in my living room into my office. Genius! My living room is oddly shaped, so I was having a hard time deciding where to put furniture. Once he suggested an office nook, the whole room took started to come together. I found a desk and bookcase for the space. I spent a month contemplating office chairs (I didn't want wheels on my carpet), and finally found one that works. It's come together nicely, and I like my little work space. I work from home at least once a week and the separation is nice. I also feel like I'll be able to better organize my paperwork (because I have so much now) and my writing. Today's post is the first post written from my new desk. I hung the photos I took of New Orleans on one wall and art work by Kelly and Anita on the other.

With the office nook completed (basically), I decided to shift my attention to something I knew was going to be more challenging, mostly because I'm super indecisive.

Curtains.

Yes, curtains. Curtains are one of those things that should be incredibly easy to deal with in a home. You find the curtains you want, you buy appropriate curtain rods and hardware, you put everything up, you hang the curtains. Done. Simple. 

There is nothing simple about curtains.

First of all, there are thousands of options for curtains. Thermal, light blocking, non-fade, countless materials. What color do you want? And while you're thinking about color, if you opt for thermal curtains you basically live in a cave if you pick a color like gray. Then there's textures - do you want to spice it up with a nice weave pattern? The fact that we can literally access millions of items for sale on sites like Amazon makes curtain shopping more like car shopping. I was overwhelmed. 

I have eleven windows to cover. Five in the living room, two in the guest room, three in my bedroom, and one in the kitchen. The kitchen window is the only one not getting a curtain (for now). I kept the curtains from my old bedroom and decided to use them in the guest room. One room down, two to go. I decided thermal curtains would be a good option. It's a lot of windows and I've definitely been able to feel the cold without any window covering. I found a few options online I liked, gray for the living room, coral for my bedroom (goes with my comforter). They arrived the next day (thank you, Amazon Prime). I bought curtain rods at Home Depot. (They're in the same curtain rod family as the one for the sliding glass door. Yes, I just typed "curtain rod family.") I unpacked one pack and realized I made a horrible decision - the curtains were way too dark. They sucked all of the light out of my home and it was sad. So they had to go back.

I headed back to Amazon and found another design I like, this time selecting "privacy" curtains. This means that light will come through, but I still get the privacy of a heavier curtain. Perfect. I selected white for the living room. The company had a coral color so I was able to keep that vision for my bedroom. I looked at about sixteen different curtains before settling on these. In my rush to order, I didn't realize I ordered the wrong length. I didn't discover this until my dad came over to help me replace a part in the guest bathroom toilet and we decided to install the curtain rods. Too short! So I had to return those curtains and order a brand new set in the right length. Thank goddess for the fact that you can drop off Amazon returns at Kohl's and not pay to return items. I would have lost money on this "project" if this wasn't an option. 

I purchased curtains three times. Three times! I couldn't believe I had to buy three sets of curtains to accomplish this "small" task. Yesterday, after three weeks of ordering and sending curtains back, I finished installing all the curtain rods (also a project of its own) and hung the curtains. They look nice, and I don't feel as weird leaving the blinds up for Keely now that I have curtains. 

I don't know if Keely is 100% behind the addition of curtains to our home. He knows how to jump behind them to get into the window, but sometimes looks at me like I've ruined his life by making him work for it. However, he did discover a fun game that involves peeking out from behind a curtain like the creeper he is.

I know there's more to do around here; the guest room is still full of boxes of stuff that doesn't have a home yet (my records and art books primarily). I need to move some furniture from my parents' house to here, but for now I think I'll take a little project break. It'll all get done eventually. I'm in no rush. I'm going to sit back and enjoy my new home. 

Coming in February: It's Carnival Time - glitter purses and Nyx 2020, we discuss my new Netflix addiction, and we get ready for Women's History Month. 

Answer Your Cat's Questions Day: Portrait Series

It's that time of the year again. No, it's not time to feel guilty about breaking resolutions or not going to the gym or some such nonsense. It's time to answer your cat's questions! Cats are very curious creatures, so we should all be excited that there's one day per year that they channel that curiosity into a productive means of communication by asking questions rather than say, climbing the fireplace grate or eating plastic. It's the little things that matter.

Keely's had a pretty busy year since his last question day. He got a new cat bed, moved to a new house, got a Halloween bow tie, sat under a Christmas tree, and watched a hawk for the first time. He's dealt with boxes, a fancy pants sofa, and scaled back on the biting. He's decided he likes our extended family, with my brother being his second favorite and my parents rounding out his top spots because they provide turkey (my dad) and tell him he's handsome (my mom). He also found a new bird nemesis, who he stalks from window to window in our new house (we have 11 windows). So much excitement for a three year old.

As the proud cat mom I am, I post a lot of photos of my cat son on Instagram. He's ridiculously photogenic, so why not? To change things up a bit, I asked Keely to prepare his questions based on some of our (translation: my favorite - he doesn't love having his photo taken, but boy does he pose) favorite portraits from the last year. Let's dive into Keely's questions!

How often do you plan to work from home? The morning cuddles aren't terrible. Did I hear you sort of say you like something related to being a lap cat and showing affection? Are you a pod cat version of Keely or do you just like me now? You like to cuddle? Amazing. I only work from home once a week, but this last week, I had to go to a special event closer to home so I worked from home a few more days than normal. We'll be back to our normal schedule next week, BUT we can still do morning cuddles on the weekends.

You know I can't talk and only understand about 30 actual words you say? I'm very aware you can't talk, but talking to your pet is actually a sign of intelligence. Human brains are a powerful thing, and talking to pets is a sign of that. In our case, I'm actually responding to the fact that you often sit around the house looking like a cat therapist, and a cat therapist seems like a great therapist to me.

Why do you insist on making all the noise with the roar-y pushy thing? I'm napping. The roar-y pushy thing is called a vacuum and I have to run the vacuum to clean our house. You shed, dirt gets tracked in, sometimes we spill things, the floors needs to be cleaned. I'm sorry if the vacuum interrupts your napping time or your sunbathing time. I'll try plan my vacuuming around your running around the house like a wild animal time. That should balance out the noise.

When did your bed get so comfy? It's so comfy. I don't understand why you move your legs or get up. The bed is the same bed we've always had so I don't know that it's gotten more comfortable since we moved. I did put a different comforter on the bed, so maybe that's what you're responding to. It's a little more squishy than the other one. You've also been sleeping on the bed every night (which is new), so it could also be that you're spending more time on the bed so you're noticing it more. I'm glad you're enjoying the bed more, but I do occasionally need to move my legs around. And I do have to go to work and buy groceries and stuff. That's how life works. 

I am majestic AF. Excuse me? Where did you learn "AF" and do you know what that means? Also, not a question. I'm shocked that you would you such language; you're only three years old. I guess I do swear like a sailor and you might have picked up a word or two. How is that one of the 30 words you understand? These things aside, I can't disagree with you. You are majestic AF. Someone should paint your portrait. 

The other lady told me I shouldn't sit on that other couch that isn't our couch. No one else is sitting on it; I figured it was for me. Why can't I sit on it? I look very regal. In the grand tradition of Garland family pets, I'm not surprised you love that sofa. The dogs, Whitney and Mack, loved it, although both of them struggled to jump on it (short legs). Pumpkin sat on that sofa like it was her job. It's a special couch, and you're all very special so that's probably why you want to sit on it. In your case, you don't like being told no, so sitting on that sofa is one thing you're really not supposed to do at my parents' house, so of course, you're going to sit on it. My mom is never really going to make you get off the sofa. Just don't throw up on it.

Why are there so many boxes around? I hate boxes. Why do cats like boxes? What's wrong with them? I think it's fascinating that you don't like boxes. Research has shown that cats like boxes because they serve as a way to hide from predators. I guess for you, the IKEA bag serves a similar purpose. There have been/are so many boxes around because we moved to a new house recently. Boxes are used to move things from one place to another, so we needed them to move. You were a very good boy during the move and I appreciate you good boy behavior. We're almost all unpacked so the boxes should be gone soon, maybe even by next weekend. 

Speaking of IKEA bags, can I have my own? So I bought you your own IKEA bag for Christmas. Every time I leave it out, you ignore it and try to climb up the fireplace grate (which you really need to stop doing). I can give you one of the older IKEA bags since you really seem to love those. I want you to be super happy in our new home, so if an older IKEA bag makes you happy, so be it. Once I get the boxes out of the guest room, I'll leave the IKEA bag out all the time for you. You can permanently live in an IKEA bag down by the river if you decide that's the way you want to live your life. 

How is it possible you don't see the ghost? It was right over your head in the old apartment. I never got a ghost vibe at the old place. It seemed too new and shiny for ghosts. I guess ghosts could be anywhere, but hear me out on this. Do you think it could be outside noises or maybe a squirrel or rodent who lives in the walls? I'm grossed out by the rodent in the walls idea, but it's also a possibility. I guess if it is in fact a ghost, I'm glad I have you to let me know. Keep up the good ghost hunting work in our new place. 

So remember that time we were at those people's house and there was that really big bird outside. What was that? How do I get it? I want to get it. So that bird is called a hawk. Hawks are birds of prey, and the feed on smaller birds and animals, including squirrels. As you know, my dad (the man who makes the turkey) likes to feed birds and squirrels. The backyard is like his own Wild Kingdom. This makes it a prime target for hawks; I'm pretty certain they're going to steal a squirrel one day (and by steal, I mean eat). Anyway, I'm glad you like watching the hawk, but hawks will also go after cats so I don't think you'll ever get to "get it". Sorry buddy.

Why didn't you get me my own chicken sandwich when you got a chicken sandwich? I like chicken sandwiches. Don't you love me? I know you like chicken sandwiches, but you can't have chicken sandwiches especially if they're from Popeye's. Fried food and spicy things aren't good for you. You may have chicken sometimes, but only if I cook it. I promise that I'll make you some chicken soon. Unrelated, but since we're on the topic of chicken sandwiches, the Popeye's sandwich is far superior to that other place and it doesn't come with a side of homophobia. Even cats know you shouldn't support hateful places even if they have waffle fries.

Do you think I'm getting better at hiding? I don't know if better is the word I'd use, but you're trying and that's what really matters. The thing about hiding is that no one is supposed to see you. It creates an element of surprise when jump from your hiding place and attack. You need to work on hiding your whole body, not just a leg or your tail. The cool thing about our new house is that we have really long curtains by one of the windows. You should focus your hiding here because you can use the curtains for camouflage. A skilled hider uses his environment to his advantage.

Do you think Billy Porter would like me? I've been working on my poses. You really loved watching Pose didn't you? I know you've been working on your poses, and I think Billy Porter would be very proud of you. You've also done such a good job working on your side eye that he can't possibly not enjoy you. I bet he'd also really like to see your version of Blue Steel; I know it's your best pose. It's not from his show, but I think he'd love it. Maybe he'll come up with a Keely inspired category next season.

Do I amuse you? Why do you always laugh at me when I sit like this? Did you watch Goodfellas while I was at work one day? This question is very Goodfellas era Joe Pesci. I call this pose your "dude who has just realized he made a very bad life choice, but there's nothing he can do about it" pose. Also that dude's name is Chad. I don't know why, but it is. When you sit like a person it makes me laugh. It's funny and silly and part of your cat charm, and it's even better when you sit on the chair or on the couch. It's one of my favorite things you do.

I really like my bed. Thank you for getting it for me. That was so polite of you, and you're welcome. I'm glad you like the new bed. In the future, let's try not to vomit on this one. I can't guarantee that I'll be able to find another one just like it.

Seriously, I'm freaking handsome. And so humble; we need to work on this a bit more. When is your album going to drop? For real, someone needs to get on this and use your handsomeness for good in the world. It's too much for just me to handle. That's why I post so many photos of you on Instagram.

I hope you enjoyed this year's "Answer Your Cat's Questions Day." Keely came up with some really good questions this year. If you need him for anything, he'll be working on his hiding skills and trying to figure out a way to catch his bird nemesis even though he doesn't go outside. If you have a question for him, drop it in the comments and he'll answer you as soon as his next nap is over.

Coming soon to the Island: I roll along the Avenue in Nyx 2020 (so much glitter) and we'll Lazy Movie Weekend AJ & the Queen. Don't miss it!

It's oh so quiet...

When I moved back to New Orleans in November 2005, it was a very different place than the one I evacuated in August. A lot of things were missing, and I mean this in every way possible. Basic services were hit or miss, depending on where you lived, or nonexistent in some places. Bodies were still being discovered, thousands of people couldn't return home or had no home to return to. Trash collection and mail service weren't necessarily priorities. Working at Loyola made some things easier; we were preparing for students to come back in January and needed to be ready. But off campus everything was harder to do and more frustrating than it should be.

It's interesting what you notice in the absence of most things. For me, one of the most noticeable was the deafening silence of no streetcar. I lived about five blocks off of St. Charles Avenue, which is still close enough to hear the streetcar and avenue traffic. There was nothing. New Orleans was silent, something I never thought possible. I missed the noise. It wasn't, at least to me, a disruptive noise, but lulling. I always felt right with the world when I could hear the streetcar ding along and the traffic move around St. Charles. It was soothing. It was home.

I don't share this to be morbid or stir up any difficult feelings for those who were there before, during, and after. I recently finished Sarah M. Broom's beautifully tragic memoir The Yellow House. I highly recommend the book if you haven't already read it. I wasn't prepared for the feelings I had reading Broom's story. It made me think about how I define home and the things that create a sense of place, like the sound of a streetcar, and what happens when that thing is gone. I finished the book in my yet to be completely unpacked condo in almost deafening silence.

Unlike the lack I felt when there was no streetcar noise, I find myself reveling in the quiet of my neighborhood. In my new place, I'm probably the same distance I was from the streetcar line to the main road, and yet I hear nothing. No traffic noises, no trucks (except the garbage truck), no buses, no dudes speeding down the highway at 2 am for no apparent reason (or maybe they have a very specific reason, but I don't need to know it). I've slept better sine moving in than I have in my last two apartments. It could be the exhaustion of moving, but I don't think so. I occasionally hear my upstairs neighbor moving around, and sometimes the dog next store barks. But that's it. I've moved onto a quiet street in a quiet neighborhood tucked behind a major highway, and I don't know what to do with myself.

When I was house hunting, I remember thinking how funny it was that some listings would talk at length about the quiet. In my head I was thinking, "shouldn't they be trying to sell my on their poor choice in carpeting rather than the silence?" I recall one that said something like "you won't even know you have neighbors!" There were lots of exclamation marks in that statement. It seemed so odd and completely opposite of the idea of community. I get it, no one wants to live below a person who clomps around all the time or throws loud parties (I'm looking at you old upstairs neighbors), but this seemed so extreme. I want to know my neighbors. I don't want to know what they're having for dinner or if someone forgot to pick up milk from the store, but I want to know they exist and maybe meet their dogs. Friendships form because of physical proximity, familiarity, and similarity. Being friends, or at least friendly, with my neighbors feels like a thing I should do.

And I have met some of my neighbors. Before I officially moved in I met Mr. B and Jessie's mom (Jessie is a dog). Mr. B reminds me of older men of a certain age in New Orleans who call everybody "baby" and are the biggest gossips, but also super nice and helpful. Both he and Jessie's mom live in the building next door and have lived here over 15 years. In my building, I've met Ginger's dad (another dog), across the hall guy who has the same ceramic Christmas tree as my parents (he told them as they all walked up the stairs together), upstairs neighbor who gets up at 4:30 am, and other upstairs neighbor who was legit eating Trader Joe's ice cream out of the carton for lunch while carrying on a conversation with Ginger's dad (she may be my new lunch hero). Everyone has been very welcoming and excited that I'm living in their community. But they're all insanely quiet. Even the dogs.

I'm hyper aware of my own volume; does the lady who lives below me think I have a tiny horse when Keely gallops through the house? Is my music too loud? Did everyone hate it when I scraped ice off my car on Wednesday (it sounded like I was killing something it was so quiet)? Can they all hear me watching Daria and are silently judging me?

Moving is a process. Settling in takes a long time, between routine changes, new arrangements, and getting everything "right." I never thought one of the things I'd have to get used to was quiet. I'm not complaining, but this is currently the most unexpected aspect of my move.