I was out at dinner with my brother on Thursday. He wanted to introduce me to a restaurant near my new place (Italian/Greek combo, good fettuccine, excellent caramel crunch cake). It was the eve of my closing, and we were discussing being adults and how weird it is that I'm buying a condo and my brother is approximately four years away from retirement. We discussed how, despite our ages (my brother is 46), we still think of other people, like our parents and aunts and uncles, as adults, but we're not. I mean, we are, but we're not. I feel like I've had this conversation before; just because you do adult things (don't be dirty) doesn't mean you think of yourself as an adult.
Until you buy a house.
I don't know if it's the amount of money involved, the fact that negotiation may/will occur, that a loan officer is involved, or the fact that you have to sign a gazillion pieces of paper to get the keys, but buying a house is the epitome of adulthood. It involves credit checks, employment verification, getting a cashier's check, and at least four types of insurance. I can't think of anything more adult than four types of insurance. I didn't know there were so many types of insurance involved in one transaction. Why didn't they teach us this in school? I had to learn how to line dance in PE and dissect a frog, but learned nothing about title insurance. I feel like knowing about title insurance should trump knowing how to do the Electric Slide.
And it feels weird. Not bad weird, but "I didn't think I'd do this" weird. It's no secret that I'm not really following a traditional timeline kind of life. I'm 40, and don't have kids or a husband, and have rented an apartment for all of my adult life. I revel in calling Keely my cat son, particularly when it makes the person I'm talking to uncomfortable. I got my driver's license when I turned 20 (fun fact I bet you didn't know about me). The idea of following some sort of predetermined life has always bothered me. We all do things in our own time, and we all have to get better about understanding that. Let people live their best lives even if those lives aren't the way it's always been.
This is why I'm surprised that I decided to buy a house. I've never been opposed to the idea of home ownership, I just never thought it was a me thing. Just like not teaching us about all the types of insurance that exist and what escrow really is, school doesn't prepare anyone for all of the sudden feeling like you need to do something you never thought you'd do. It doesn't prepare you for having to discuss square footage, floor types, condo fees, and parking. I can't exactly explain, but one day I just couldn't face the idea of renting another apartment. I want to paint. I want to redo a bathroom in three years. I want more space.
I closed on my house on Friday. I made delightful small talk with a notary from the title company, my loan officer, and my realtor (because I'm so good at small talk), and signed all the documents and gave them all my money (not all, but you know what I mean). I got my keys, a folder full of papers (which I'll also get electronically apparently), and a promise that my deed will come in the mail. I celebrated by having lunch with my parents and buying a unicorn key chain for my new keys.
Today, I sat on the floor of my new home and stared at the walls for about an hour. I hung the shower curtain in my bathroom, determined that Keely and I will continue to share said bathroom, and figured out that the desk I was going to take from my parents' house is probably too big for the spare room. I met a neighbor, who I'm pretty sure is the neighborhood watch. I still have no idea where my couch is going to go or the television. I glanced through the very large file of appliance manuals the previous owner left me; these very fancy appliances are mine now and I don't know how any of them work. I started planning where my dishes and baking stuff is going to go. I realized that I have a lot of dinosaur decor, which may negate the fanciness of the fireplace. I made a list of all the stuff I still need to buy (garbage cans, don't forget new garbage cans). I tried to remember how to turn on the fireplace, but my mind went blank (my dad probably knows how it works). I wondered if my furniture would look okay or if I'm going to hate everything I own.
And then I laid on the floor in my living room and it was very quiet. I felt at home.
Coming soon to the Island: We recap the year that was 2019, Keely moves into the new house, and I update you on all that glitters in preparation for Nyx 2020!
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