Thursday, December 27, 2012

It's the end of the year as we know it and I feel fine

Well kids, it's that time of the year again. A time when we all make a list of all the things we are or aren't going to do this year. As much as I like lists, I never make resolution lists. It always seems like a waste. Am I going to go to the gym everyday because I resolved to do so? No, I've been resolving to do so for years and it never seems to stick.

Instead of resolutions, I like to plan to do a few things/goals/activities (or just one) that I'd like to try or try to do more often this year. I don't really consider these resolutions since it's not a huge deal if I don't do them and frankly, none of them make me feel bad about myself (which resolutions typically do). I've always felt that resolutions were invented so that we'd all feel guilty about something all the time and then hate ourselves a bit more because we didn't meet the expectation of the resolution. Why do that to yourself? I'm certainly not going to and hopefully, the things I decide on this year will be fun and exciting. Anything we try to do should empower us and that's the point of what I do every year.

Last year, my list included seeing more live music (I sort of did this but only once I moved back to Virginia), writing more (DONE), going bowling more often (I went once but with strangers so I'll consider that a draw), helping Anita Smallin make National Postcard Writing Month happen (we'll just have to try harder this year), and to be the leading lady of my own life.

It's the last one that I'd like to focus on today. Here is what I wrote last year:

Be more like Kate Winslet’s character in The Holiday. I love this movie and I identify with Kate’s character the most. One of my favorite parts of the movie is when her next-door neighbor (the fantastic Eli Wallach) tells her to be the leading lady of her own life. He recommends all these wonderful classic movies that have leading ladies who are extraordinarily independent and awesome. The women and eventually Kate, have gumption and moxie. That’s what I will strive to do this year. 

This, Island readers, is what I will do this year because I only did a so-so job last year. I've often felt like the sidekick in my own life. If I had to pick the characters I most identify with on my favorite tv show, Gilmore Girls, it would be Lane and Sookie. Lane and Sookie are Lorelei and Rory's sidekicks (when Lorelei and Rory aren't busy being each other's sidekicks). I get it, they're not Gilmores but you know what? They're awesome and they deserve leading lady status as much as those Gilmores. I've always felt like Lane (mostly) - quirky, way into music no one else likes, and an introvert (not shy, just not an engager).

Sidekicks wait. They go on "adventures" with friends, wait for others to make things happen. You know what happens when you wait for others? Nothing - you sit at home watching Hallmark movies and thinking about all the things that you could be doing.

Back in March, I wrote about being labeled "pretty, funny, or smart" by a teacher of mine as it related to the Rush Limbaugh/Sandra Fluke incident about contraceptives. I've been thinking about that particular post again lately because I've had a series of conversations (mostly with other women) that lead me to believe that we still think that you can only be one of these things. I am tired of thinking that being independent and smart and quirky are somehow bad things and relegate us to sidekick status. That the capacity to do things by yourself or alone (not be lonely) is somehow a bad thing. It is not. That because I'm independent and quirky and smart and do things by myself, no guy will ever love me (which someone told me recently - apparently I'm intimidating and quirkiness has been taken over by hipsters so it's not attractive and I should dial down the quirkiness) and that I am only my job because clearly that's all anyone ever is. You know, if you're not a mom (because then I would be mom first, career second - apparently). Are you kidding me? Is this still where we are for women and girls?

It's unfortunate that so much of our lives are spent not liking anything about ourselves. Or we spend so much time trying to be something for other people. Why do we do that to ourselves? I feel like since I entered my 30s I have truly liked who I am, what I look like, and what I do with my life (career, hobbies, etc.). It's fascinating to me that it took me until I hit 30 to really feel that way.  I just want to be happy and enjoy my life and stop trying so hard to be things I'm not. I want to be like the 3rd grader who dresses as a different historical figures that she likes (male or female) because she has fun doing it and is learning something at the same time. Because she is being the leading lady (in a lot of ways) of her own life.

So my plan for 2013: be the leading lady of my own life.

I will leave you with the wise words of the poet/rocker Liz Phair. Because we all are extraordinary.




Video from youtube.com

PS - Thanks for reading in 2012! I hope that you come back in 2013. I promise more lazy movie weekends (we haven't talked about The Warriors or Moonrise Kingdom yet and we need to) and there will be another Bad Shakespeare/Island of Misfit Toys crossover at some point (I may or may not talk about superheroes-you won't want to miss that). And don't forget about Paris in June-it's going to be amazing.

Have a safe and Happy New Year!

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Never a party girl

I would like a nice, powerful, mind-altering substance. Preferably one that will make my unborn children grow gills. 
Mary (Parker Posey), Party Girl



He-he-hello!

The movie Party Girl was one of my favorite movies when I was in high school. At that time, my goals in life included living in New York, being a struggling theater artist, and generally being awesome. I wanted to be like Mary in this movie (minus the drugs since I don't do drugs). I envied her shoes, ability to wear tights and not look like she was trying to hard, and the fact that she felt no shame in "closet shopping" at a party ("Hello Chanel"). Also, she ends up wanting to be a librarian. Perfect.

Everyone loves a party girl. I thought that this particular type of personality would make my life better and you know, funner. Everyone wants to be funner. But being a party girl is hard. You have to go out all the time, be "on" all the time, have a high tolerance for nonsense and shenanigans, and drink excessive amounts of alcohol. No shame might also be a good trait.

You know what else party girls have to do? Dress like party girls. I don't and never have had the wardrobe. Like Cher in Clueless, I'd rather veg out in comfy clothes because party clothes are way too binding. And the shoes! As much as I love my heels, I don't know how anyone can wear them all the time. How is it possible that any woman makes it through the night without hobbling foot pain or having someone carry her (which I did witness when I got back to Clarendon and was walking to my car)?

Towards the beginning of the evening...
I am not a party girl. I am the most the most responsible person in the room. And when you're the most responsible person in the room, people get a little surprised in those instances when you do go out and enjoy yourself. It's like when you were a kid and you saw your teacher at the grocery or the mall; it was odd and surreal. You couldn't believe they were a real person and did real person things. Well, the same thing is true with the responsible people - when you stay out late and bar hop or whatever it is that you're going to do, people are amazed.

I've spent the past two Fridays out with friends from work. Some of the group were part of my ill-fated trivia team. My team captain skills have left something to be desired and trivia has fallen by the wayside (sorry friends). Anyway, I guess I normally only hang out with the majority of these friends in the structured confines of the after work happy hour. We work in Clarendon so you can literally throw a rock outside our office building and hit a passable/enjoyable happy hour location. Normally, our evenings end early (it is a school night usually) and no one leaves Virginia until they're ready to go home (for those who live in Maryland and DC).

Required stop at a CVS to act silly
But Fridays tend to be a different story especially when it's the last two Fridays before holiday break. Why wouldn't you go out until 2 am? Or move the celebration from Clarendon to DC? What time does the last Metro run back to Virginia? In my quest to be more of a party girl, I can't say no to any of these ideas. Yes, I want to go into DC for one more round even though it's already 11 pm. Sure, let's walk even further away from the Metro for more fun. And a much better jukebox - why didn't we just start here in the first place?

Inevitably at some point in the evening my responsible self kicks in. I decline another drink, switch to water, and start to plot exit strategies. I check my Metro app to see when the next train is and start herding people towards it. The mother hen in me takes over and I start taking care of people. Erin Counselor (what some of my friends call me) comes out and I have to start making sure we're all making smart life choices. Because that's what Erin Counselor does - she makes sure that people make smart life choices.

And this is why I will never be a real deal party girl. I have come to terms with this and I guess I've accepted it. I'd rather sit in a dive bar and listen to good music all night, joking and talking with my friends than to wear heels and an inappropriately short (for the weather and for life) skirt and have to be on the whole time. The world is made up of all types of people. The Erin Counselors and the party girls coexist to keep the natural social order in place.

Video from youtube.com

Sunday, December 16, 2012

It's the most wonderful time of the year?

I'm giving thanks that we don't have to go through this for another year. Except we do, because those bastards went and put Christmas right in the middle, just to punish us. 
Adele (Anne Brancroft), Home for the Holidays 

I want to be very clear - I like Christmas. There are even things that I love about Christmas (more on this in a moment) but I don't LOVE Christmas. I don't start listening to Christmas music in July or have everyone's gift purchased before Halloween. I enjoy decorations but I don't enjoy decorating. I guess Christmas and I just have a complicated relationship. It probably has to do with the magic of Christmas dissipating over time - when I was 6 I believed so much in Christmas and Santa and the magic of the season. Now that I'm in my 30s, I just want to stay home and drink some hot chocolate (or something more adult) and watch Christmas movies. Maybe it's all the noise or as the Grinch would say, "That's one thing I hate! All the noise, noise, noise, noise"

But let's stop discussing my old lady grumpy behavior and let's focus on what's enjoyable about the holidays. My family is quirky and so we have some random holiday traditions that I'm very proud of and I fiercely adhere to and will probably do so all of my life. My family likes to watch holiday movies on Christmas Day (typical rotation: A Christmas Story, How the Grinch Stole Christmas - animated version, Christmas Vacation, Elf, and The Nightmare Before Christmas). My father is a big fan of The Santa Clause movies so we typically watch all of them at least once. Last year we also watched the worst Christmas movie ever: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. We all make bad life choices some days and that might have been our collective bad choice last holiday season. It was bad in an MST3K way so at least we could laugh about it but we also could have been watching Elf for the 7th time and that would have been so much better, you know, because smiling is my favorite.

Probably my favorite of our family traditions (and the one that everyone knows about) is our obsessive holiday baking. We have always made a large number of holiday cookies. A typical Garland family holiday baking list might include: cutouts (obviously), snowballs, chocolate chip cookies, random cookie Mom found in a magazine and wants to make, the Christmas Day cake (a more recent addition), banana bread, and spritz cookies. The best part of making cutouts with my parents and brother is that we get ridiculously silly while doing it. My mother and I laugh about things that are not funny, my brother stares on and probably has some sort of internal dialogue going about how he needs to leave the country next year and get out of baking, and my father rolls out the cookie dough and occasionally turns and says things like, "What are you laughing about now?" He's a very patient man, my dad, and seems to put up with silliness very well. My mother and I may or may not be able to tell anyone what we're laughing about because we don't know or we're laughing too hard. And we make snowmen cookies that look like the Blues Brothers. We call them the Belushi snowmen.

I'm not sure when any of this is occurring this year since I haven't been told to come over to bake yet. Seems suspicious.

Now that I bake on my own I also add additional cookies/baking to the list. My 2012 holiday baking list (and this seems ridiculous to me when I think about it):
  • Bourbon Pecan shortbread
  • Regular shortbread
  • Cutouts (including ninjas)
  • Petit fours (for a baby shower that is next week)
  • Hot Cocoa cookies (for my office's cookie exchange, plus extra for people who aren't participating but I know would enjoy a cookie or two)
  • Banana bread
  • Homemade marshmallow fluff (for the Hot Cocoa cookies)
Ninjas, not skate punks. Next time, I'll ice them instead - ninja costumes and throwing stars.
It's possible I need a hobby that doesn't involve baking. I tried to calculate the amount of flour and sugar I've gone through since moving back to Virginia and I had to stop because my head started hurting. I guess it doesn't really matter since people seem to enjoy the baked goods and I like it when people are happy.

As a general rule, I don't like Christmas music at all. My father looooooves Christmas music and would probably play it all the time if we allowed him to but we don't. I think I really used to love Christmas music (and I know all the words to the songs) but now I just can't deal with it. If the music didn't start in October maybe I'd feel differently. Now, I don't mind random Christmas music like a Johnny Cash Christmas or Christmas in Detroit (featuring the greatest holiday song of all time, "Christmas in Jail"). I love David Bowie and Bing Crosby singing "The Little Drummer Boy/Peace on Earth" and any Christmas music by a brass band or Harry Connick, Jr. is alright in my book. But that's where it ends. But I get it if you enjoy Christmas music and want to listen to it all the time just bring headphones and don't tell me about it.

The best thing about Christmas (or whatever holiday you might celebrate around this time of year) is that it's all about what you and your loved ones make it. If you like to go to Burger King on Christmas Eve, then you should (a tradition we once did) or if you open presents on Christmas Eve, then do it. If everyone in your family has to wear a hideous Christmas sweater, be that family (and take pictures for me). We all make the holidays what we want them to be and spend time with the people we love and care about-that's what's important.

And Harry Connick, Jr. singing.



Sunday, December 9, 2012

In a monument state of mind

"The Washington Monument is big, and I supposed it could be also be classified as impressive or noble or something along those lines; symmetrically presidential might be the ideal term. But what is this 550-foot masonry structure supposed to tell me? What is is supposed to make me understand?"
                                           -Chuck Klosterman, Killing Yourself to Live

Chuck goes on to discuss whether he's supposed to think about George Washington, the nation's capital, and compares going to the Grand Canyon to seeing the monuments. Ultimately, the monuments do nothing for him and he concludes that "It's just...tall."

Oh Chuck! You know that I love you and your books but I just don't agree at all. I love monuments and historical sites and historical markers. Monuments and historical markers give us the sense of the historical "us" of living in the US. How else would we know about all the random things that happened right outside our doors or along the way to visit famous rock and roll death sites (like Chuck)?

Honestly, my ideal road trip across the US would involve stopping at every historical marker that I saw along the way (and it would culminate in going to Frontier Days in Cheyenne, WY). That road trip just screams awesomeness. I could start by driving just around Virginia; I probably wouldn't make it 10 feet without finding one. In fact, I saw a school group walking around my neighborhood a few weeks ago checking out the markers in the area. Maybe I'll start there.

My family moved to Virginia when I was in the 7th grade.  I've been to all the monuments, the Smithsonian museums (and the zoo), the National Gallery of Art, the National Archives, the White House, the Capital, the Supreme Court, and a lot of other historical places and spaces multiple times since every single family member and several of my parents' friends came to visit us over the years. I was a tour guide at the Newseum before I moved to California. The DC area appeals to the history nerd side. I love a plaque on the side of a random building and I love telling people the bizarre historical facts I've collected over the years. Fun fact: Wok and Roll in Chinatown is in the building that was Mary Surratt's Boarding House (yep, where the Lincoln conspirators met). Enjoy that food and check out the plaque next time you're in the area.

My friend Amy is in town this week. Amy is an ideal partner in crime - up for adventures, having fun, and a good laugh. She hasn't been to DC since the 8th grade so we decided to spend Saturday visiting the monuments. The National Mall is one of my favorite places. When I was an information desk volunteer at the Freer & Sackler Galleries, I used to cringe every time someone would wander in and ask where all the stores were located. The National Mall is not that kind of mall. It's an English mall - meant for walking and promenading (and picture taking, so much picture taking).

If you exit at the Smithsonian Metro station and you walk to your left, you'll eventually come to the Washington Monument. You can't really miss it - it's a 555 foot tall obelisk. It's the tallest building in DC and it's sort of sad to see all the fencing up around it. The monument sustained damage in the 2011 earthquake and it not currently open to the public. You can at least take pictures and bask in its awe-inspiring glory. Fun fact: the monument is different colors because of construction delays (due to lack of funds and politics as usual) and the inability of later builders to find stone from the same quarry. Amy and I heard some people criticize the different colors today as we were walking back. Researched that one for you, Island readers.

As you walk past the Washington Monument and cross the street, you enter into the World War II memorial. This is a newer addition to the monuments opening in 2004. There's construction going on around the World War II memorial and the Reflecting Pool. It's not as nice and tranquil as it normally is but I guess that's progress or something. We made our way along the Reflecting Pool and heard a mom say to her son, "Remember that part in Forrest Gump when Jenny ran across the pool?" The mom said Jenny exactly like Tom Hanks in the movie. Amy and I laughed about this throughout the day especially since I had also mentioned the movie but without the flourish of a Forrest Gump impression.

We finally made it to the Lincoln Memorial. Lincoln is my favorite. I probably bored Amy to death with my random Lincoln facts (more to be shared later on when we went to the American History Museum and I mentioned embalming and the fact that there was a challenge in transporting the President to Illinois for burial). I loved Manhunt but haven't seen the new Lincoln movie yet. You can read both the Second Inaugural Address and the Gettysburg Address while visiting with Abe. The Lincoln Memorial screams presidential to me. You can't help but think of the awesomeness of the job of the President and the challenges Lincoln faced while in office. I'm also sort a Civil War nerd too so I read about Lincoln a lot. I can't even imagine being the President and daily thinking about what was happening on those battlefields and across the country. Lincoln is also beautiful at night. Hollywood occasionally gets something right when they film here.

We also went to the Korean War Memorial (which I had never been to before) and to the Vietnam Veterans Memorial. These two memorials are the most difficult to view (I think). I've seen people at the Vietnam Memorial overcome with emotion. It's one of those moments you don't want to see but you totally understand. Amy was able to find the name of her relative who was listed as MIA in 1970. It's was an emotional end to our memorial/monument tour.

What I find most interesting about all the monuments is that they're all controversial to someone. Whether it's the design or the location or the exclusion or inclusion of one group or another, no one is ever happy with a monument. It's disheartening to think about that when you're actually standing in front of the monument or memorial. How does one even decide who gets to be memorialized?

Here are a few tips from Amy and I about truly enjoying your day on the Mall. Ladies, let's discuss footwear. I don't know about you but when I walk at least two miles (the distance from the Smithsonian to the memorials and back), I don't want to wear high heels. I barely wear high heels in my normal life but really? We saw countless women in very high heels walking along the paths to the Vietnam Memorial (which is partially cobblestone) and up the stairs (so many stairs) to Lincoln. This is more than likely why fashionable tennis shoes were invented (I can't be certain of this but it's a pretty good guess). Even if you drove over to the monuments and parked, I don't want to be you at the end of the day.

Also, let's discuss decorum at and around the monuments/memorials. I will give you your space if you are protesting something or whatever, but driving past the Vietnam Memorial is not a time to blast really loud music (rap in this case but it would apply to any music) while stopped at the light. Show a little respect for the people on that wall and turn the music down or off. It's not that hard to know when you're right there - you can see it from your car.

And how did we finish our day? Discussing First Lady fashion and seeing the flag that inspired The Star-Spangled Banner and of course, seeing the dinosaurs. What trip to the Mall would be complete without seeing the dinosaurs? And the Hope Diamond (we did that too).

So Island readers, especially those of you in the greater DC area, get out and visit our lovely city. Go see a monument or two. Go visit your favorites at the Smithsonian or the National Gallery of Art. It's another thing you can do to be a good citizen without being political. We have so many amazing opportunities here to see so many great things and we never do it. Or we only do it when the company is in town. There's nothing wrong with being a tourist in your own town. I'll help you plan your day if you'd like. I'll even throw in some unnecessary historical facts so that you can impress (or bore) your friends and family. Because I care.




Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Old lady concert rules


As I've gotten older I've noticed that I complain about a lot of things I never cared about or complained about before. I haven't decided if it's because I'm settling into the behavior pattern of the old lady that I will become one day or if people are just more annoying now then when I was younger. It's also possible that I have less patience now than I did before but I find that hard to believe given what I do for a living. Maybe it's just that I save my patience and allowances for nonsense for my clients and co-workers rather than strangers.

My old lady behavior is at its worst at concerts. I wasn't always an old lady concertgoer. When I went to my first concerts (New Kids On The Block, Def Leppard, Huey Lewis & the News), I was so wrapped up in the coolness of finally going to a show that I couldn't care less what people around me did or didn't do. It was all about the music and being impossibly grown-up.

I've been to a lot of shows over the years in every type of venue and all sorts of bands and musicians. I've been to Jazz Fest more times than I can count and I went to the first Lilith Fair (1997). I also went to one of the first concerts at what was then Nissan Pavilion (R.E.M., 1995). I even flew to Detroit to see The Stooges reunite for The Weirdness tour in 2007. I'm still sad about the whole "don't play anything from Raw Power rule" that was in place but at least I got to see Ron Asheton play before he died.

My top six concerts of all time are:
  1. Patti Smith and Her Band, Ram's Head Live (12.01.12)
  2. Pixies, DAR Constitution Hall (12.01.09)
  3. The Decemberists and the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra, Merriweather Post Pavilion (07.14.07)
  4. Tina Turner, New Orleans Arena (10.25.00)
  5. Tori Amos, DAR Constitution Hall (04.26.96)
  6. Run DMC, Palm Court at Loyola University New Orleans (10.24.99) - Loup Garou y'all (old school style)
The Patti Smith show on Saturday was amazing. I've never really understood why people follow charismatic leaders and do really stupid things because of said leader but after this show, I totally get it. If Patti Smith ruled the world it would be a better place and I would do whatever she said to do. She's empowered and hilarious and dances like no one's watching and sings the saddest songs with the same spirit as rock anthems. When she sang "Because the Night" I could feel the longing for Fred "Sonic" Smith, her late husband and a founding member of MC5. She dedicated it to him and her reworking of the song was about him (Springsteen originally recorded it but wasn't pleased with the song; Patti took it back and made it a classic rock love song). It was one of the more moving concert moments I've ever experienced. Did I also mention that Lenny Kaye played some songs from The Nuggets and it was badass?

While I was enjoying the awesomeness of Patti, I also had my old lady concert moments. What's interesting about a show like this one is that you're going to have a huge range of ages in the audience. Lots of old punks and rock guys who saw Patti in New York in the 70s, college kids (so many college kids), people my age, and everything in between. A lot of shows at Ram's Head are 21 and up but I'm not sure that this one was. I got there early (as is my habit for most everything) so I had a pretty good spot on the floor (Ram's Head is standing room either in the pit/floor area or upstairs). I never go upstairs. In the space of the 2 hour set (thank you whatever spiritual force was at work for no opening act), there were a whole lot of my old lady concert rules broken. So let's discuss the rules.
  1. When you go to a standing room only show and you get there late DO NOT push your way to front. Your friends are not up there waiting for you (we know you're lying) and the rest of us got here early to get our spots. Suffer in the back where you belong (and I don't care how short you are).
  2. Don't wear the shirt of the band you're going to see. Don't be that guy (or girl).
  3. No backpacks in the pit. When you start dancing (and you know you're going to start dancing girl who cut to the front), your backpack will hit everyone around you. And impede our dancing/headbanging/etc. You deserve the elbows that you get.
  4. When you buy a ticket to a seated concert, stay in your seat. I didn't pay the large sum of money I paid for my seat to look at your back for 2 hours. Unless everyone is standing, sit the eff down.
  5. I get it - I was born in 1979 and missed all the great shows in the history of great shows. I will never get to say "Remember when Patti sang "Because the Night" for the first time at CBGB's?" or "Did you see that show where the Ramone (insert whichever one) fell off the stage?" You are Captain Cool and I bow to your coolness. However, if we're at the same Patti Smith show and you're going on and on and on about how much better she was two days ago when you saw her in New York or wherever, I reserve the right to tell you to shut up. No one cares because we're trying to enjoy our own Patti Smith experience. 
  6. Variation on the rule above: If you want to discuss how you used to go see the band before they were famous and now they're "sellouts" because they booked the Verizon Center or wherever, please be quiet. You bought a ticket to this show and being successful doesn't equal selling out.
  7. Strike the word "merch" from your vocabulary. Do you work in the music industry? Are you in a band? Do you want to sound insufferable all the time?
  8. If you're going to drink at the show:
    1. Don't dance like you're an extra in a movie about Woodstock. You're not in a field and there are other people around you.
    2. Apologize if you spill your drink on someone.
    3. Don't drive. Have a DD, take a cab or public transportation, stay somewhere nearby. 
    4. If you are with this drunk fool, take responsibility for them and don't laugh like it's the funniest thing ever. Also, if your friend is about to get into a fight or hitting on someone who is not interested, get them out of there. For real.
  9. Don't yell "Freebird." It's not funny, the band doesn't appreciate it, and chances are the vast majority of the audience doesn't get the reference anyway (depending on the show).
  10. Tailgating should be reserved for sporting events (see #8 as well).
  11. Cell phones are not the same thing as lighters. 
  12. Don't carry on loud conversations during quiet songs (lady on the 2nd floor at Ram's Head, I'm talking to you). If The Velvet Underground's Live at Max's Kansas City teaches us anything, it's that no one cares if you want to go to the movies later or how awful so and so is. Even if you are Jim Carroll. 
I know, I'm turning into such a grumpy old lady. I don't even know what's wrong with me. With the exception of numbers 4, 6, 9, and 10 all of these rules were violated at the show on Saturday. I know the world does not exist solely for me. People can do what they want and live the lives they're going to live but I think we'd all enjoy concerts much more if we all followed the rules. I just want everyone to be a good rock and roll citizen. Is that too much to ask?

I'll leave you with this (I get a little teary):


I'm just behind and to the left of the older gentleman with the ponytail and the green jacket but out of the frame.

Video from youtube.com
Photos by me

Saturday, December 1, 2012

Unnecessarily attached to people who don't exist


It's not difficult to become attached to fictional characters. Books, movies, tv shows, songs - it really doesn't matter. Think about all the major motion picture franchises of the last few years: The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Harry Potter, Twilight (although I hate to include them), the Marvel Comics films, The Hunger Games - very few of these started with fans of just the films. Most people who went to see these films (including myself - except Twilight) had some kind of attachment to the characters before they got in line. The power of good story is that we connect to it on a personal level. That's what keeps us rereading books and waiting in long lines at the midnight show. We want to see those beloved characters come to life. 

I even do this is cycles: every 2 years, I reread Anna Karenina. It's my February book. I haven't seen the new version of the film yet (maybe over the Christmas holidays) and I'm worried that I'll hate it and that somehow the book will be ruined for me. I mostly blame this on the casting on Keira Knightley.

The first real characters I felt this way about were the characters in Judy Blume novels. I'm convinced that she created all of these characters exclusively for me. Margaret, Sally J. Freedman, Sheila the Great, Fudge and Peter - they were all my friends and I wanted to hang out with them and/or be them (in the case of both Margaret and Sally). While I did read the "older" books (Deenie, Forever..., Wifey, Summer Sisters), my favorites have always been Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret and Starring Sally J. Freedman as Herself. I reread them both recently and I still identified with Margaret and Sally. And honestly, I'd really like to know what happened to Margaret when she got to high school.

Recently, I've found myself not identifying with characters in books as much and more with characters on tv shows. Gilmore Girls, Leslie and Ben on Parks and Rec, Jaye from Wonderfalls, and even the characters on Hell On Wheels - I just can't help but be concerned for them and invest way too much time in thinking about what's going to happen to them (except Jess and Dean from GG - I don't care and I don't like either of you).

But the show that takes the cake in my habit of becoming attached to people who don't exist is Treme. I'm still thinking about the season 3 finale (and there may be spoilers in a few minutes but I feel like you've had plenty of time to watch it) and how I was concerned the entire episode for Terry and LP's safety. Honestly, I thought that one or both of them would get killed or seriously injured in this episode. It's not like it's unrealistic given their professions (detective and investigative journalist respectively).

There's a part in this episode where Terry goes to get into his NOPD issued car and he's knows something is up (given his status in the department) and my only thought was, "Please don't get into that car because it will explode and you will die and I'll never get to see you and Toni happy together on this show. And then I will be sad." He does not get in the car (and it doesn't blow up) but he does find drugs in the trunk because his fellow officers are trying to set him up. He walks away and lives but I hate that he's the only honest cop and no one else seems to get it. Even in the final moments of the show when he and Toni are sharing a post-Jazz Fest beer on the porch, an NOPD car rolls by watching them. And I thought - they're going to die (but they don't). When LP made it to his flight safely, I let out a sigh of relief. (The man tailing him the whole episode? Federal agent who likes him not who wants to kill him.) And laughed when he told a girl at the airport that his favorite music was "metal and sea shanties."

There are so many characters to love on this show and I honestly don't want anything bad to happen to them. (We'll have to discuss the season 2 finale and Annie's uncomfortable use of Harley's music this season another day.) When it does, I get made and all riled up on their behalf. I know that a lot of why I specifically love this show is because it's the closest thing I have to New Orleans in my living room once a week. I cry during every Mardi Gras episode. I watch for people I know (since many local actors have parts on the show) and I pine for the food and the music and the people.

Andrew, Ghost Tour guide
I could go on for hours about LaDonna, Albert, Annie, and Antoine (characters I also adore beyond belief and would fight for if it came down to it) but my other absolute favorite is Davis. Steve Zahn is perfect as Davis, part-time DJ, New Orleans music fiend, and all around man with a plan. The character Davis based in part on an actual person, Davis Rogan, but he actually reminds me of my friend, Andrew. Andrew and I have known each other a long time and he moved to New Orleans when I was still working for the university. He instantly fit into New Orleans (I occasionally describe him as the King of New Orleans). Andrew, like Davis, seems to know everyone and is involved in all sorts of artistic and cultural and random events. And it all makes sense in the world of New Orleans. That's what I love about the city and Treme - you see the juxtaposition of the insane and the sublime, the normal and the unusual in everything all the time.

Treme is done for the season and there's only five more episodes left for the entire series (at least that's what I've heard). I guess I'll have to find something else to do with my Sunday nights. Or I could just start it all over again from the beginning. Maybe I'll find more things to love about my favorite fictional characters.

Check out Andrew's album: http://www.wahida.org/
Photo by me
Image from http://apples-and-books.tumblr.com/post/33218813216/today-i-fell-in-love-with-another-fictional